Trapped in a toxic cycle of never-ending highs and lows? It’s time to take control of your brain and break the pattern.
Image by What is Trauma Bonding?
This is when a man or woman is bonded to another abusive man or woman.
Why would anyone bond themselves to an abusive man or woman?
It stems from childhood programming. If you lived in a toxic home environment, the chances are you will equate love to abuse. This is because you couldn’t escape your childhood home and so your brain learned to integrate abuse into your psyche. The brain wires things this way for survival. You’ve now learned to adapt to abuse in ways that have become ‘normal’ for you.
‘Better the devil you know.’ Staying in your comfort zone is not comfortable but it is all you know, that is why it can be hard to leave.
How do you get out of a trauma bond?
First and foremost is AWARENESS. This usually comes after going through many patterns/cycles of abuse. One minute you are in love the next you are in pain. Love, pain, love, pain, love, pain until one day you say NO MORE!!!
Then you EDUCATE YOURSELF. Like reading this post and seeing the patterns in your life.
Watch YouTube videos on Trauma Bonding and Narcissism so you understand exactly what you are dealing with and experiencing, then you’ll soon learn you are not alone, many have walked this path and are helping others break free.
With knowledge comes power, so the last and probably the hardest part is taking ACTION. Applying the knowledge you’ve learned and breaking the cycle of abuse.
So, that is the nuts and bolts of how you break free from a trauma bond. Simple, right? On-screen, Yes, in life, No. As I said earlier your brain is hard-wired for survival and it’s taken you a lot of cycles to wire in these patterns of negative behaviours. Repetition is required and yes failure is going to be part of this journey, but failure is part of success. Let me repeat that again.
‘Failure is part of Success’
You are going to fail, accept that but don’t give up on your first setback. As you are missing the golden opportunity of wisdom in a failure. When you fail ask yourself. What caused me to revert backward? What did I not see or what lies did I believe? Don’t ask Why questions. They are never ending and just like the abuse cycles will keep you spiraling into an abyss of rumination which ultimately keeps you trapped.
Break through your prison mind by hammering home all that you have learned about abuse, narcissism, and trauma bonding, and keep practicing until it rewires the brain into moving you beyond this toxic pattern of pain.
There are many wonderful tools available online to help you achieve this. Use visualisation and imagine yourself free, whole, and living the life you truly want to live. This will also give your brain dopamine hits of pleasure and it will seek more of these experiences out in life. You are training your brain like training an animal. You want it to go catch the happy experiences and not the abusive ones. So, keep throwing in your mind all those happy ideas and visuals. Then you’ll soon start running after them.
If you can’t visualise go online and watch something that you can teleport yourself into and see yourself living that life. Feel what it feels like, see it, smell it, touch it and use all of your senses to bring into your mind maximum impact for maximum results.
If you haven’t heard of Dr. Joe Dispenza then I urge you to check out some of his amazing work. He really does help rewire the brain and offers wonderful meditations and even live events you can attend to transform your life. He is an expert in freeing many individuals trapped in patterns of unwanted behaviour. You can check him out at: https://drjoedispenza.com/
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Wishing you a wonderful pain-free life. Thanks for reading! : )